Schizophrenic.

Don't look at me through your prejudiced filters. You try taking a born and bred KL-ite and transporting her to another coast, hundreds of miles, tons of new faces, one language barrier, a brand new social strata, thousands of little faux pas and a whole new lifestyle.

It wasn't easy and it still isn't. This time its closer to home, yet so much further. 

Stick that up yours. I'm not one to just turn around, look at my past and then decide that I want to completely have nothing to do with it. They say adapt, so I adapt. They say repent, so I repent. 

No one said anything about forget. Or hate. Or have selective memories. Or turn-your-nose-up-at-your-friends-for-thou-art-holier-than-they-now.

I know whats the code of conduct, when I'm home or away. Does it matter if it makes me schizophrenic? 

They're all friends, I've been through skinny and XL with them. Be it from SBU or PC or KMB. I'm me at all times, just different shades. 

So quit acting flabbergasted by the difference in the way I act when I'm with them. You don't treat an Eskimo and an Arab the same way. If the ability to juggle different worlds makes me dysfunctional so be it. 

You got it easy if the transition didn't squelch your personality. I know who I want to be albeit the fact I can fit into many molds. I'm talented like that, thank you very much.

I've done things I'm none too proud of. I don't intend to repeat them. I'm far from perfect, and I know I gotta keep working at it. But who said I had to do it your way? Seriously, it takes longer than a year, or two.

I'm not an anti-conformist but neither will I bend to your insipid opinions on how I should/should not act. As long as I'm not breaking any rules, it really is inconsequential. What hurts is the way you cast dagger looks at me, and tut at my conversations and roll your eyes at my pictures.  

So, I'm going to stop now. I'll come clean and be myself. If you can't accept it, at least I'll be able to.